FINALLY HERE

ALIFE AXZ X ADIDAS...the hardest shoes to get

WHO: DAN
WHAT: ALIFE X ADIDAS (AZX PACK "R" FOR RIVINGTON CLUB)
WHEN: END OF OCTOBER
WHERE: ALIFE NYC TO WELLINGTON NZ
WHY: WHY ASK...ITS A MUST

Aquiring sneakers has always been much of a talent for a few people...buying them full price is another thing...maybe because Im dutch which means it aint much, but either way im a sucker for ALIFE...(www.alifenyc.com) the footwear and apparel is ballin out of control and my collection boasts some 15 odd pairs of collabs with REEBOK pump, with WU TANG and just straight dopeness...so when they released the azx online it was a must...i owed it to myself and it dropping around my birthday was a must for my girlfriend to cop it for me...what a coincidence you may say, however this is the first pair of alife collabs she has ever bought for me...now the story begins...

As i type this I still do not have them...

first i thought this was a mishap and they would send it...but its been 3 months...whats going on? sweet fuck all is the slum dog millionare answer....ZIP, ZILCH, NADA!

So myt girlfriend calls them....with replies of "yeah no worries well send it"....still no reply or shoes...so i jump in

RING RING (the sound of phones when ringing new york?)

ALIFE: Rivington Club!
Dan: Hey! Im dan, im from new zealand and ive been waiting for 2 months now for my shoes
ALIFE: (long pause)...who the fuck is this?
Dan: Dan from New Zealand
ALIFE: First off who the fuck is Dan, and where the fuck is New Zealand?
Dan: Ummm...by australia..? anyways bro i just want to know where my shoes are weve been emailing some dude called drucker but no reply i just want my kicks man
ALIFE: yeah you gotta email drucker
Dan (no shit!) yeah bro i did but he aint replying
ALIFE: uuuuhaiiiit...email me (chris) and ill sort it out
Dan: Mean bro thanks for this aye, so i'll just repeat your email address back to you to clarify ...
ALIFE:....BEEP BEEP (hung up on me)

1 MONTH LATER, 4 WEEKS, 31 DAYS, A SHIT LOAD OF HOURS

RING RING (the sound of phones when ringing new york?)

ALIFE: Rivington Club!
Dan: Yes i need to talk to someone about my shoes that i bought 3 months ago!!
ALIFE: ummm Hold on dude!
(ELEVATOR MUSIC...getting transfered to someones line)
ALIFE: Jason!
Dan: Jason its dan bro i bought shoes from you guys ages ago and i still dont have them whats going on i need the us 12's!
ALIFE: man you need to slow down...i'll pass you back to chris
Dan: NAH WAIT
(ELEVATOR MUSIC...getting transfered to someones line)
ALIFE: Chris!
Dan: Chris its dan from New Zealand where are my shoes!
ALIFE: yo you that nigga that called me like a month ago from New Zealand right?!
Dan: YES THATS ME!!!
ALIFE: then why the fuck you callin homie?
Dan: those shoes never came
ALIFE: for real dawg?
Dan: yes my friend....no shoes!
ALIFE: aiiit hold up dude, ayo Manny you send those shoes off to New Zealand homie...
ALIFE(1): What shoes?
ALIFE: Manny i put the order on your desk son, come on this nigga been waiting for months
ALIFE(1): I didnt see shit nigga...
ALIFE: ayo dan you still there?!
Dan: Yes yes yes yes ... whats up
ALIFE: email Manny hell sort it out
Dan: (thinking .... ah fuck now ive emailed everyone from the alife team!) Thanks Chris your a life saver mate (was gonna get sentimental)
ALIFE: Be easy sonALIFE:....
BEEP BEEP (hung up on me)

So i emailed Manny they sending me a half size smaller than what i bought...moral of the story is talk slow, think fast and what ever you do talk black and sound important, it seems to work better than sounding like a snobbby white dude

I thank you ALIFE!!

PAUL WALL VS MARK (WESTLIFE)

First and foremost...im sitting in AK and sam and wes start cracking up saying that Im the dude from westlife aka mark..i googled it before you say anything....then i get a call from sams better half saying that Im now Paul wall (if i was a rapper....havent you heard my last 20 mixtapes...pacific beatz featuring split fiddy!! lolz)

but yeah payback will be a bitch as soon as i find some good match ups!!! ahahah....oooooooh revenge is sweet

NEW: SMASHPROOF FT. GIN WIGMORE - BROTHER

ooooooh...ive been a sucker for this track eversince the snippet got released on line on the MTC blog...im always down for some greasy chicken, a copy of the notebook, writing poetry about illustrious romantic dinosaurs and more than anything when hiphop heavys drop their guard and spit "the realness" ... I personally have never sat down with Sid...ive met him on few occasions usually through Sam, and I will nervously wave, however more so admire his ease and full swing effort on live performances...aside the media's take on things I rate him as the man! I remember Felila, Campo and me going up to Auckland for the half marathon and sitting waiting in the lounge and Sid and Mr. Sicc was there...a kind of felt it was my duty as a avid fan of good music that doesnt boast a gangster background and hangs with brown and white people that like hiphop but dont tarnish its names by giving passerby's the "uber-evil-hiphop glare" that "sid, .... mate...you rock bro, your sounds ballin"

p.s who was first Duffy or Gin Wigmore...its kind of like Gin was thinkin..."ooh duffy sounds dope, NZ wont catch on to fast ill just do my thing here...and itll be a case of the egg or the chicken..."

Thats right gin and Im t Pain

I want to work for ... Diddy

I was too late....but was I really...?

Bad Boy Entertainment....here I come sir

P-MONEY X THE TEMPERANCE X WED NIGHT

I'll start this off with saying...FUCK THE TEMPERANCE BAR...the guy that runs it is a kiddy fiddler, his bouncers are wife beating derelicts and their dress code is whacker than a crack smoker...however that behind me, Pete is playing their this Wednesday which is cool...his gig at Garden Bar was mean, would have been just a tad better if there were more than 50 people there, however Garden Bar and Shan are probably still trying to decide who fucked up, either waaaayyy...make your way down to The Temperance for one night only to see the man do his thing!....and never go to that ridiculous bar again...

ONE!

SATURDAY THAT WAS....

NESIAN on new album!

These dudes are and could be officially the nicest cats to ever meet, in terms of the welcoming and continuous gratitude they show!!! For those that cop the album do it one way or another, lets get the ball rolling kiiiiiiiiiiid

AK ! ! !

Went to AK for the weekend again,....gotta gold card membership staying at Casa de la Sam e Ailsa...mean perks to the accommodation such as constant good times, snoring, eating, drinking, x box, downloaded movies, and more recently two consecutive movies that contain male front on nudity...g-o-o-d times...The numero uno Wes was in town as well so it was mean to catch up with the benchmarkers and see whats running hot and cold!! I notched another rapper off my list aka Scribe, met him somewhere on the same lines as meeting Devolo but none the less i drank with him, which theoretically constitutes as fuck all, as the bar tender at his local probably would have more of a connection and Im sure if I pulled him out of a burning house and then ran back in to grab his fighting goldfish he still wouldn't remember me...however despite this its mean to meet someone whos album you've thrashed the shit out of and played to your mates back in Europe!!!

We did a few food joints like this underground sushi place on sunday night on 3..? Queen Street that gave us cabbage with mayo....A WHOLE FUCKING CABBAGE with MAYO ON THE SIDE....in holland the feeling of eating this would be like walking around a playground when your 80 years old, no hair and a constant hard on, without having the pills to aid the limp!

NOTE: SIRVERE I KNOW YOU DON'T READ MY BLOG BUT GO TO THIS JOINT AND EAT THERE, AND TAKE PICS OF THE FOOD ESPECIALLY THE CABBAGE!

Picked up some "female kicks" for Felila, on a day where the only one keen on going to Country Road was ailsa, and where we all including Liam (ailsa's brother) wanted to go home and K the fuck Out!

Anyways pulling on strings, gwann gwann!!!!

kanye wizzler

Word!

6pm work done, accompanied by a samoan, a tongan, a inked out surfer boy and myself (the gift of the gab), a bottle of alize and a bottle of Canadian Club, we made our way to the gig...missed scribe...caught Nas...and then saw Mr West...ooooooooh...to all the alternative fucks who actually understood why kanye serenaded him self for 20 minutes should all pull their knee socks up, tighten up the bow tie and get back to your gay bash swinger party, because that dude lost the plot...However in saying that Mr arrogant himself was rocking fresh J5's a must ... met the entourage in the morning...pretty much conversation went:

Dan: Yo what up...whats good....yezzzzzur...ola! etc etc

Black entourage: I got two questions for you...how much and do you have a size 11?

Dan: Yeah bro hard....so what you guys been up to anyways...hows the tour?

Black entourage:........you gotta a toilet?

Dan: Ummmm no...but if you get me backstage passes ill catch your shit (exaggerated a tad)

Black entourage: Then what are we doing here?

THE END

He posed a great final question...what were you doing "Mr. I'm Kanye/nas entourage however this white muhfucker prolly dont know that i trim kanyes pupes"...I admit i eat ass when i need to...hell if its got $1000 bucks in i'd prolly rim lick and catch the aftermath...but dude you gotta be nice!

01:00am go to Sanwiches to see Nas, they want $30 im thinking .... EAT SHIT

Then Nas pulls up out back and I scream at the dude for a flick he looks at me and then walks in...I ask his lady advisor she says line up like the rest and buy a ticket...if youre reading this, eat shit, you think you're the bomb because for one night only you riding with Nas, but in 2 weeks Mr Jones wont even remember your name, and when you come crawling to Loaded for me to cheer you up with some fresh shoes and maybe some sneaker protector, ill probably upsell you a can of Ironlak and give you a bag so you can inhale the fumes!

One love Nas